


oh what a beautiful moron

by lostin_space



Category: Roswell New Mexico (TV 2019)
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Bad Flirting, M/M, One Night Stands
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-08
Updated: 2020-06-08
Packaged: 2021-03-04 05:47:00
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,032
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24598489
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lostin_space/pseuds/lostin_space
Summary: Alex sneaks out after a one night stand only to run into another person on his not-so-shameful walk of shame.
Relationships: Michael Guerin/Alex Manes
Comments: 18
Kudos: 143





	oh what a beautiful moron

**Author's Note:**

> meet ugly prompts 27. we had one-night stands with roommates and sneak out of the house at the same time

Alex groaned as he woke up and looked around to the gross ass atrocity that was the bedroom of a frat boy who had too much time on his hands to drink, but not enough to clean.

The human disaster in question was laying beside him still, bare-assed and snoring. His blonde hair was a mess and he seemed sleeping peacefully despite letting his late night Grindr hook-up stay for far too many hours. Alex hadn’t meant to pass out, he wanted to leave before any of the other occupants (another guy and a girl, he’d learned) in the apartment rose and had questions. He was trying to _not_ out this man who, as obvious as he was, didn’t want to be out yet. Alex could respect that.

He slowly peeled himself off the bed, trying not to wake him as he got dressed so he could leave. Alex quickly pulled on his jeans and his shirt, not bothering to fix his hair or put on his shoes as he tip-toed out of the room.

Which just so happened to be at the same time as the person across the hall was exiting their room.

Alex’s eyes went wide as he locked eyes with a guy who seemed to be sneaking out just like he was. The guy went through a series of emotions on his face, first realizing he was caught, then probably remembering the girl he’d slept with only had male roommates, then realizing that Alex was _also_ sneaking out, only to then settle on laughter.

Despite not knowing this guy, Alex grabbed his arm and basically hauled him all the way to the front door so he didn’t wake anyone up by laughing. 

“I’m sorry, sorry,” the guy laughed as Alex closed the door of the apartment, shaking his head at the stranger, “I’m not laughing ‘cause of the gay thing, I’m laughing, ‘cause, like, what are the _odds,_ man?”

A closer look revealed that he was probably also a frat guy at the same university the occupants of the apartment he’d just escaped were. He had the face for it and definitely the demeanor. This one, however, was a much more attractive version than the rest of them. He had a head full of curly hair, kind eyes, tanned skin, and just a whole face of gorgeousness to work with. Alex still sighed and bent down to slip his shoes on.

“I’m Michael, by the way,” the guy said, bending down to put his shoes on at the same time.

“Why are you trying to make small talk with me?” Alex sighed.

The guy, Michael, flashed a charming smile that suddenly made a lot of sense on how he ended up in someone’s bed. Alex pushed that thought right out of his mind.

“I don’t know, you look like the kinda guy I’d wanna make small talk with,” he said, “Or big talk. Dirty talk, maybe, if you’re feelin’ frisky.”

Alex felt like he’d been given a gift-wrapped headache.

“You _literally_ just walked out of some girl’s bedroom,” Alex said, standing up and staring at the moron in front of him, “And then laughed at me for looking up with a guy--”

“Hey, wait, no, I said it _wasn’t_ laughing ‘cause of the gay thing.”

“--and then felt like it was an okay idea to give me a shitty pickup line as a joke. What planet do you live on?” Alex scoffed.

Michael seemed frozen, lips parted in confusion. Alex stood, waiting for an answer like an annoyed parent. His mouth opened and closed a few times before he finally landed on an answer.

“In my defense, it wasn’t a joke, I was actually hitting on you,” Michael said. Alex’s eyes widened all over again and his hand went up to his forehead as he processed what he was saying.

“ _Why_ did you think _that_ is okay? Also, has that ever worked? What am I saying, of _course_ it worked, you literally just got laid,” Alex scoffed, shaking his head. Michael’s dopey face bled into an equally dopey smile all over again.

“Yeah.”

“You are... Look, you know what, thanks for the offer, but I’m not interested in any more one night stands with self-proclaimed straight guys. I’ve sworn them off,” Alex insisted, turning on his heels and walking away. Michael followed him like a lost dog.

‘Well, hey, don’t just assume I’m straight, man,” he said. Alex rolled his eyes. “Seriously. Bi, look.”

Out of curiosity, Alex slowed and looked over. Michael was hopping on one leg to keep up, yanking up his pant leg to reveal a bi pride flag tattooed on his leg. Alex raised an eyebrow.

“For real?”

“Yeah, for real. Got it after I ran into too many situations with too many people who didn’t wanna bang a bi guy,” Michael explained, “Which, you know, brings me back to the question. Would _you_ bang a bi guy?”

Alex sighed and felt himself caving into that charming smile of his. He sort of hated himself for that.

“Still doesn’t explain why you’re hitting on someone while leaving a one night stand,” Alex pointed out.

“Look, I’m not a saint, but clearly you aren’t either,” Michael said, following him more closely now that he was walking rather than hopping, “And you’re also the hottest guy I’ve ever seen and if I let you leave without even asking, I would have a lifetime of regrets.”

Alex sighed again as he got to his car, still trying to avoid the charm dripping off the moron beside him.

“The hottest guy you’ve ever seen?” Alex clarified, leaning against the door. Michael made a show as he looked him up and down before nodding.

“Easily.”

“Fine, give me your phone,” Alex said, holding out his hand. Michael’s face lit up and fished it out of his pockets. Instead of giving him his number, he opened Instagram and had him follow him before handing it back. “We’ll see how good your game actually is.”

“Okay,” Michael agreed, giving him space to get into his car, “I can work with that.”

Alex drove home excited to see if he actually could.

**Author's Note:**

> also on my tumblr: spaceskam


End file.
